The day is only halfway through, so while the girls are busy working on their diaries (they’re still on Day 1, so slow progress), I thought I’d get ahead of the game by writing of this morning and afternoon’s events ahead of Kynren, which if it doesn’t rain, will be spectacular.

We drove to the middle of the UK – roughly – that is halfway between Newcastle on the East Coast and Carlisle on the West Coast, at its thinnest, The UK is only 84 miles wide – and the boarders of Hadrian’s wall is a good half way point, albeit not exact.

I checked to make sure that the girls didn’t get car sick, as it is a hilly journey, up and down twisting country roads most of the way there – in fact, Daria thoroughly enjoyed going over the ‘bumps’. It is an idyllic English countryside, rolling hills, plenty of sheep and cows – and about an hour from where I live. There are closer Roman forts, but this is the first set on one of the peaks.

I would say it was fairly windy when we got there, but not too cold. I had also picked Houseman’s as they were having an activity day, where there were plenty of men (5) dressed up as different ranks of Roman soldiers and even a Scotsman! We had a quick chat to the lowliest ranked recruit, who had goosebumps! He wasn’t entitled to the full uniform, so had to wear sandals and shorts on duty – wow this guy took his work seriously. I asked how many years before he’s old enough to represent one of the higher ranking officers – some time I’m afraid.

He was very knowledgeable about the role he played, so we spoke to him as if he was a Roman Soldier (who thankfully spoke 21^st Century English). He’d signed up for 25 years, and so didn’t have enough to buy a warmer uniform, as he had to save up from the rations he was given every month, and the odd payment, so he could buy a warmer uniform and better weaponry. I asked the girls if they’d want to ask him anything – they nearly ran away, cheeks flushed with embarrassment – however, they did consent to stand next to him for a photo opportunity. (Oh to be young).

I asked him what his survival chances were, and he said pretty good. The leader of the army was a greater target in battle, and there wasn’t really much going on at Hadrian’s Wall. The wall was more to keep the Scots out and stop the profiting from trading, as they didn’t want to pay the taxes due (I don’t think that’s changed… sorry, couldn’t help that, it wasn’t really a racial slur, I would have said it of any nation – who wants to pay taxes?!) Therefore, no battles to fight really.

We moved on and looked around, the girls enjoyed climbing around on the ruins, but were getting a little cold – as mentioned it was windy!

To warm them up a little, I took them out of the Fort area and up to the wall to the left of the fort. We walked along a copse, then pointed out the sheer drop on the other side of it. I reminisced on the difference between two sensible 16-year-olds and six rowdy 9–12-year-olds 4 years ago. I was close to a nervous breakdown last time, with kids running so close to the edge. Marina bravely walked out to the lookout point and posed for pictures, whereas Daria craned her neck towards the edge and decided she wasn’t going near it. Such a relief for me!

As we came out on the other side, we got to Mile Castle 37, not sure which side of the UK it started from though. They nodded politely and didn’t clamber all over it like a troop of monkeys, giving their English teacher heart palpitations like last time, very serene and mature.

We walked back and I recollected the last time I was there and Sasha slipped in the cow dung! I reflected on how many ways I could mention it, so as to tease her and check she’s reading this 😉 – such a good sport Sasha!!

I gathered the lunch from the car and we found a nice picnic table, occasionally the sun came out and it was glorious, then it started to rain and we made a dash for the car.

In the afternoon the girls had some time to work on their diaries – making quite slow progress, I think that they are perfectionists and want it just right, I saw some torn-out pages and then they started again.

We didn’t have dinner at home – in hindsight I’m not sure that was a good idea. However, I wanted the girls to have the full experience – so we set off at 6pm for a 9.15pm performance (an hour away).

Everything went to schedule, we parked in the field – the girls were intrigued, and given that there was a shuttle service, they were worried that they’d be going on a long walk – again, all about the full experience, and of course to keep them warm! I had warned them that it’d get pretty cold once the sun had gone down (that in itself is a joke, we hadn’t actually seen the sun much today).

1km down the lane, we got to Three Arches, the area where Kynren is performed. They’ve made some changes since the last time, there’s a purpose-built restaurant area with a little lake in front of it – reservations only and a non-vegetarian set menu meant that I hadn’t considered it. They’ve also updated the method of food delivery by limiting the options and having them all in one place, so one long but fast-moving queue. Ten minutes later we were at the front of the queue and there are about 20 odd tills to take your order, then ‘collect’ it, by which it means go to the counter and give someone your ticket. It was the first night of this year, so there were teething problems – luckily rice noodles and chicken weren’t on our wish list, but things were running out left right and centre.

Marina and I had a wrap, Daria had popcorn chicken with chips, with a cookie for good measure. I ordered a small bottle of wine – to warm me up, purely medicinal I assure you! I asked the girls to find a table – and bless them, they stood shyly next to a whole set of tables not daring to ask if any of the seats were free. Once I had arrived, I stared down a couple and they quickly ran away (in reality, I asked if we could share their table, and they said that they’d finished anyway.)

It was quite obvious to Marina and I that the wrap wasn’t going to be enough – so I went back to get some chips for us. Thank goodness we’d already bought the cookie, as they had run out of those too – I was wondering if I could sell Daria’s for a profit, but that would’ve been mean 😉 Things had turned a little more barbarian, and people were muscling in, and civilisation was in rapid decline. So, when a man stood in front of me and the server asked who was next, I popped my head around and told them that he’d queue jumped! He gallantly said that he could see two servings of chips right there and ‘this lady’ should have those poste haste! I thanked the kind sir – took the food and ran. More disappointment greeted me at the table. Daria said that she’d finished off my glass of wine. Then said she was only joking, the wind had knocked the plastic glass over – I howled, I wouldn’t have minded if she had drunk it – the waste of a perfectly adequate merlot! Anyhow, a mouthful or two was left in the bottle, so all was not lost.

We hadn’t brought the umbrellas, as it had looked fine when we got there. I had checked the weather forecast, even asked one of the guides there – she said that BBC had said no rain!! We made our way to the seats and the moment we got through to the stands and found our seats – it began to rain! Luckily, the woman in front saw that I was getting wet, and kindly said she had an extra plastic waterproof that I could cover us all in. The girls were wrapped in 4 layers of clothing, and each had blankets for their legs – this wasn’t my first rodeo. I have to say – they were really excited about it all, which was very gratifying for me.

The show started promptly. I saw it twice four years ago, I enjoyed it very much – it hasn’t changed at all! It is still narrated by Kevin Whately who played Lewis in Morse – and I looked him up and found out he’s from Chollerford near Hexham (which we drove through on the way to Hadrian’s Wall), and is a Geordie! There were a few bits missed, they played Indian music during the part with Victoria, and last time there were Hindu dancers, so it was a little strange to have the sitar playing without a context. I also noted that there were no non-white faces at all! Is this indicative of Bishop Auckland?

They went through the whole history of England – just as last time, with plenty of animals, jousting, dancing, fire works etc. Daria was thrilled! On the way back to the car, she said that she couldn’t stop smiling – I too was really happy about that!

They had Lindisfarne – which I had pointed out to them from the train – they spoke of Hadrian’s wall – yep, been there today, and then just as before: 1066 (a lesson about that followed, obviously), then Henry VIII, Elizabeth I (with an appearance from Shakespeare), Charles I lost his head – again, Victoria and Industrialisation – ha! Told you the steam train was important. WW1 was represented by the Christmas Day football match (who actually won that?) and then right up to Elizabeth II – and there it stopped. Hmmmm – now is it because they just don’t want to change it, or are they making a political commentary by not mentioning the current monarch?!

Anyhow, smiles all around as the evening came to an end. We got home just after midnight, and I’m afraid that I was just too tired to write it all down – phew I hear people say, can you imagine how long it would have been if I’d written it last night while it was still fresh in my mind, there’d be another 2 pages at least.